People who share children have to be able to work as a team so they’re able to do what’s best for the children. While it isn’t always easy to make this type of arrangement work, you can do things to make the situation easier.
Having a detailed, well-thought-out parenting plan can minimize confusion and conflict with your co-parent. Consider these points as you work out your parenting plan.
Focus on the children — not on each other
The differences between you and your co-parent can’t be the focal point of the parenting arrangement. Instead, you have to be able to focus on the children. Putting them first may help to prevent a lot of the issues that might come up. One thing to remember is to avoid badmouthing the other parent because speaking negatively of each other will likely lead to unnecessary stress. While it might be difficult to enforce, having a “no disparagement” clause can help establish your expectations for each other.
Have similar rules in your homes
One thing that will make it easier for the children is if they have similar rules in both homes. This might be as simple as having consistent bedtimes and study requirements for school. Even if the rules differ from one home to the other, be sure to establish those as early as possible so that your kids know what’s expected of them.
Anyone who’s going through a divorce should ensure they have their parenting plan in place as soon as possible. This can help the children to get accustomed to the new way of life, and it can help to reduce the stress for everyone in your family. Always remember that your children did not ask to be born and it’s your job as a parent to place their needs above your own as well as the difficulties that led to the marital dissolution.